Overly accommodating people speed dating in los angeles over 40

The tricky part is keeping the ball rolling; it’s easy to trail off – or worse, make someone feel uncomfortable about dominating the entire conversation.You have to be an active listener, taking what they say and bouncing it back by asking the questions.Part of the reason why it’s so popular isn’t just because it’s a low-stakes way of starting a conversation but because it almost immediately hooks people’s interest. You will be so ruined that nothing will ever grow where your remains lie. He would return the book later with a simple thank-you note…and the next time they would meet, his rival’s attitude would have changed so profoundly that they would often be close friends for the rest of their lives.The sort of person who can just sit down with someone and have them feeling like they’ve known you for even though you’ve only just met? We’ve talked a lot about charm and charisma before, and what it takes to be a more fascinating, magnetic person.The key that underlies it all, to building a rapport and finding that connection, is simple: you have to be able to make people feel good.Tilting your chin down ever so slightly gives a feeling of being equal and approachable.

Instead, you want to angle yourself slightly away from them, which feels more accommodating and friendly.Franklin was taking advantage of an effect known as cognitive dissonance – the tension between the man’s attitude (“I hate Ben Franklin”) and the fact that he just did a favor for a man he disliked.Our brains don’t like the tension; we prefer to at least So by asking a stranger for their help – getting some advice to settle a disagreement, wanting to know where they got those boots, what they think about the brand of phone they’re using – we’re asking them to do something nice for us. Another key psychological component to building rapport with someone is to remember that we instinctively like people who like . So one of the easiest ways to indicate that we like someone is to let them know we think they’re fascinating and that they have a lot to offer.How did it go down, what did you do, how did you feel, what did they say? these are questions that encourage your new friend to fill in the details and paint an even more interesting picture of their lives.Can’t think of any questions besides the standard “Who are you/what do you do for a living? It doesn’t need to be accurate – although most cold-reads are designed to be almost universally applicable – it just needs get them started talking.

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Consider practicing these in the mirror; notice how different an innocuous phrase can seem when you’ve tilted your chin up vs. Keep in mind: this is a too quickly under normal circumstances – myself included.

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